Lyrics for Smack That by Akon

Songwriters: Mathers Iii, Marshall B; Strange Jr., Michael; Resto, Luis Edgardo; Thiam, Aliaune

I feel you creeping, I can see you from my shadow

Wanna jump up in my Lamborghini Gallardo

Maybe go to my place and just kick it like Tae Bo

And possibly bend you over, look back and watch me

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Upfront style ready to attack now

Pull in the parking lot slow with the ‘lac down

Konvict’s got the whole thing packed now

Step in the club, the wardobe intact now

I feel it, don and crack now

Ooh I see it, don't let back now

I'ma call her then I put the mack down

Money? No problem, pocket full of that now

I feel you creeping, I can see it from my shadow

Wanna jump up in my Lamborghini Gallardo

Maybe go to my place and just kick it like Tae Bo

And possibly bend you over, look back and watch me

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Oh, looks like another club banger

They better hang on when they throw this thing on

Get a lil’ drink on

They gonna flip for this Akon shit

You can bank on it

Pedicure, manicure, kitty-cat claws

The way she climbs up and down them poles

Looking like one of them putty-cat dolls

Trying to hold my woodie back through my drawers

Steps upstage, didn't think I saw

Creeps up behind me, and she’s like, "You're..."

I'm like, "I know, let's cut to the chase

No time to waste, back to my place"

Plus from the club to the crib it's like a mile away

Or more like a palace, shall I say

And plus I got pal if your gal is game

In fact he's the one singing the song that's playing

Akon!

I feel you creeping, I can see it from my shadow

Wanna jump up in my Lamborghini Gallardo

Maybe go to my place and just kick it like Tae Bo

And possibly bend you over, look back and watch me

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Eminem's rollin', D an' ‘em rollin'

Boo and ol' Marvelous an' them rollin'

Women just hoein', big booty rollin'

Soon I be all in 'em an' throwin’ D

Hittin' no less than three

Block wheel style, like whee

Girl I can tell you want me 'cause lately

I feel you creeping, I can see it from my shadow

Wanna jump up in my Lamborghini Gallardo

Maybe go to my place and just kick it like Tae Bo

And possibly bend you over, look back and watch me

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Smack that, all on the floor

Smack that, give me some more

Smack that, 'til you get sore

Smack that, oh ooh

Tech Support

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

Thanks,

Troubled User.. (Keep reading)

_____________________________________

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under ! Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

Kannada Barutha??

Namaskaara..... Geleyarey....!

"Kannada Barutha??"

Aaaah! I am sure most of you in Bangalore would have heard this, but what is "kannada barutha?" here it goes. Bangalore the IT capital of India, the silicon city and now a Metro city opened its gates to almost all kinds of people. Very evidently the recent poll census proved that there are only 47% of original inhabitants in Bangalore/bengaluru. The life style of the city has seen a gradual change with Pizza Corners replacing MTR's, classy eat out's replacing "Vidyarthi Bhavans" and flashy pub's replacing all our "Mahalakshmi wine shops".

"Change is inevitable" from the days of BEML, HAL and BHEL to INFOSYS, WIPRO; Bangalore has a new look now on the world map. Gone are the days where a typical Sunday for any bangalorean was a nice romantic walk on the pavements of "LALBAGH...", "rave idli and coffee.." at the nearest yet old looking MTR and a wonderful Annavra film either at Santosh or central 'talkies'. Today's Bangalore is deluged in traffic, stress and pressure,
Saturday nights without beer is desolate and a Sunday without a visit to either a nearest spa or health clinic is schlocky!! The gandhibazar's are now AC cooled super markets, majestic is now replaced by ultra modern and diversified Brigade road, sri cauvery coffee joint is now Coffee days and "Bhagyalakshmi coffee adda.. is now barista. With globalisation and more retail market the city will definitely see more forceful changes.


Have all these changed our language? Kannada the local language of Bangalore is supposed to be one of the most meaningful languages, it also has an unique script as compared to its other counterparts; but how many percentage of people really use Kannada in Bangalore now? The figures are staggering, only 37% of people speak Kannada in the state's capital, for rest it is only "Kannada barutha?"


Any normal guy starts with this sentence "Kannada barutha?" while talking to other person, people confirm before they speak the language. You want to ask an address in Bangalore? Or reply to a question then English is the most preferred language other than Hindi. It's a famous fact that two kannidagas in an IT company always talk in a neutral language!! Even the vendors and shop keepers are channeled with this new wave, the moment when you step in any shop in Bangalore, you are always asked "Kannada barutha?" or the entire conversation takes place in non Kannada languages. People have lost the confidence of speaking in the local language and more over speaking Kannada on the streets of "M.G road "or "kormangala" is substandard.


Shopping malls in the city have been completely banned from using Kannada, not a forced one but definitely an adapted one. One has to confirm that the other person knows the language before he starts using any language. "ondu glass beer" is a insult when it comes to any decorous pub in Bangalore. "Swalpa menu card kodthira..??" has been replaced by "Can I have the menu card please...?"


Just to hit some facts, marathi is still the largest and common speaking language in mumbai even though mumbai has the highest no of inhabitants. Telugu is a practised ritual in yet another IT HUB Hyderabad. When it comes to tamil nadu, beware you can be alive either if you are a fan of rajnikanth or you know tamil. Malyalam runs in the blood of every mallu be it Kuwait, Dubai or any hospital; but when it comes to Kannada it isalways "kannada barutha?" and next is "namaskara."


I am neither a Kannada activist nor do I run any Kannada supporting organization, I am just a plebeian who just love the language. Globalisation is the trend and modernisation is the mantra but at the cost the language? Sounds no logic.. Is speaking Kannada down market? The answer has to be found within oneself. Next time when you hear "kannada barutha?" you just remember that "kannada runs in your blood.."

When Grandma Goes to Court

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorneycalled his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and in a very quiet voice said

'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'